The Quest for The Perfect Handbag

Autor: christabelb
No matter how many handbags we own, there is always the quest to find
that perfect handbag. It is a quest that rarely gets fulfilled. There are
frustrations that we can sometimes have with our precious everyday buddies
that quite frankly piss us off. The top 5 frustrations with handbags are:

1.They are a vacuum for dirt, hair, old chewing gum and crumbs (even
though you have never used the handbag for a plate before).

2.When the mobile is ringing in a densely populated potentially embarrassing
place (e.g. silent train packed with commuters, important meeting at work)
the bag seems to want to hide the phone and bury it in the most awkward
place possible in order to maximise time taken to retrieve the ringing phone
and then letting the phone stop ringing after you, red faced and flustered
have retrieved the phone.

3.Handbags tend to be quite possessive and clingy. If you ever try to move
your worldly possessions from one to another new bag, the older bag will
hide an Important Object from you in attempt to keep your loyalty to it.
Unfortunately though it means we end up panicking and never finding
Important Object for months. Sometimes to be extra sneaky, the old bag
will hide the object in a hole in the bag lining so that you think you have lost
the object for good. (A bit like when Carrie thinks she has lost her Carrie
necklace in Sex and the City).

4.Like cats, they don¡¯t like being cleaned.

5.They don¡¯t appreciate the fact that they are too bulky to store neatly.
They enjoy the chaos of jumbling around in the space that you put them;
whether it¡¯s under the bed, at the top unreachable shelf of your wardrobe
or on a coat peg.

There are 5 key criteria I believe that need to be met for The Perfect
Handbag:

1.Has to fit in half the contents of my house for when I am staying at the
boyfriend¡¯s house, or on an expedition around the city.
2.Has to be soft and willing to expand if necessary to fit in a lot, or shrink
back to normal size for the leisurely activities of shopping or meeting up with
girlfriends!
3.Has to look elegant and pristine at all times. Even through rain, wind and
sun.
4.Needs enough pockets for quick and easy access to the following items:
mobile phone, travelcard, ipod, make up, chewing gum, tissues¡­need I go
on?
5.But most importantly, has to fit in with my style and look the part.